The "STEPS" sobriety retreat based on the twelve steps has ended in the Licheń Center for Assistance to the Family and Addicts. The participants focused on the third step of anonymous alcoholics: We made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand Him.
The retreat leaders encourage you to observe yourself, to work focused on your own feelings, emotions and to build interpersonal relationships. - If we are talking about any change in sobriety or behavior, it must start with yourself. And to do this, you need to understand yourself, accept yourself and then love yourself - explained Maciej Nowakowski, psychologist and addiction psychotherapist at the Lichen Center for Family and Addicted People. The third step of A.A. gave rise to three points. First, a relationship with his father from his childhood, translated into a relationship with God. - I emphasize that the relationship between a biological father and God can be completely different. It is important that the difficult contact with the father does not translate into a vision of God. In the second aspect, I focused on giving my life and will to God as opposed to placing myself at the center of the universe. For a change to take place, you need to be dethroned and create a space for God to act and heal family relationships in this way. It is also important to learn to listen - explains Mr. Maciej.
The issue of reciprocity in relations with God and loved ones was also discussed. - A healthy relationship is about listening, trusting, accepting the truth that can hurt, talking about your emotions, not humiliating or criticizing. Approach with respect to other people, and above all with love - noted the psychologist.
After establishing the retreat community, the participants celebrated on Friday at 8.30 p.m. the Way of the Cross on Golgotha. By meditating on the station of the painful path of Jesus, they came to know the Person of God to whom they wish to entrust the will and life in accordance with the third step, to which this retreat is dedicated. - It is an extremely important thing to entrust your will and life to God's care. The first and second steps are to acknowledge powerlessness, then that there is a God, a higher power. In the third, I give myself to Him because He has power. It is sometimes this truth that takes a long time to come to. One of the participants said that he tried to skip the third step, but it was impossible to go further - said Fr. Zbigniew Borkowski, MIC, director of the Licheń aid center. - The steps are a universal path for all people. Not everyone is declared a believer. However, it is a path, so I sincerely hope that sooner or later a given person will identify with a personal God - he added.
The facilitators help to deal with emotions and relive them constructively for both sober and co-addicted people, who often focus on their spouse's problem, forgetting about themselves.
During the retreat, there was also a breviary prayer, the Eucharist, workshop work with a psychologist, addiction therapist and meditation on the Word of God. The meeting ended on the first day of the Week of Prayer for the Sobriety of the Nation held in the Catholic Church from February 27 to March 5.
Ala and Rysiek from Połczyn had run away from problems before, but had to rebuild the bond. During the addiction, there was anger, there was even no transfer of information because Rysiek did not accept it. - Today we can talk about books and about everyday life - said Ala. - A relationship is a process.
Z początku Ryszard nie wierzył, że nie będzie pił. Nie rozumiał też, dlaczego pije. –Chyba z dobrobytu, bo miałem czas i pieniądze. Musiałem iść na detoks i 60-dniowe leczenie. Wtedy zrozumiałem, czym jest choroba alkoholowa. Nie dotyczy ona jedynie ludzi z tzw. marginesu. Jest to choroba „demokratyczna”, bo może dotknąć każdego. Najważniejsze dla mnie było zakręcenie butelki. Zacząłem chodzić na tzw. mitingi, okazało się, że trzeźwienie to długi i złożony proces – Ryszard przekonał się, że Bóg istnieje. Jak sam stwierdził, nie dałby rady, polegając tylko na sobie, wyjść z nałogu.
Today, he doesn't make long-term promises, but focuses on staying sober 24 hours, overnight. - It does not matter if someone has been drinking for 20 years or 2 months. We are only one glass away from the fall. After the meetings, I know the mechanisms and I have the tools to fight alcoholism. Today it is different, I have a sober view of my surroundings, which does not mean that there are no problems that need to be faced. I learned to work as a team, to use the help of my family - he admitted.
If you are interested in retreats organized by the Lichen Center for Assistance to Families and Addicted People, check the center's offer here or call (63) 270 81 32.
Browse through the offer of retreats at the Sanctuary of Our Lady of Licheń retreat calendar
